Keeping Positive with change

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TrashHeap
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Keeping Positive with change

Post by TrashHeap »

How do you keep a kid focussed towards their goal.

I am going through this right now with my kid. She is getting down on her bowling.

In my opinion she has great form, and her timing has improved greatly. She is not seeing it in scores. She is getting frustrated. I saw this yesterday at a high school bowling match.

She got into this mode where she just shut down. She lost focus. She pulled the ball left across 3 frames (6 times in a row, strike ball and spare ball). Didn't move or adjust to the pins. Just stood on the same board for every shot. Eventually she tried to stop pulling the ball and ended up throwing it in the right gutter. She was lost.

I knew what she was going through. I have been their many times myself. The only difference is all my experience of competitive bowling happened for me as an adult and not as a kid.
jruffolo
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Re: Keeping Positive with change

Post by jruffolo »

Her form and timing are off; but the biggest problem may be frustration. Working on swing and balance and staying loose may build her confidence. Many kids don't have a pre-shot routine that helps them prepare for a shot and get relaxed.

Some kids get really down on themselves when they don't perform well. I try to get them to forget about bad shots/games and focus on a few basics. Stay positive and be encouraging.
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Re: Keeping Positive with change

Post by rrb6699 »

Actually she cares too much about the results. Getting relaxed is the first thing. When she warms up and starts throwing strikes, just remind her to stay in that relaxed state.

Putting aside lining up and proper 'feel' of a well executed shot, the hardest thing i had to overcome was to 'erase' what just happened. Good or bad it cannot be changed. Pocket 7-10? I just look at it as a practice shot for the 10 pin or 7 pin. I could get lucky but not expecting a spare. success will be hitting what i'm aiming at ... either the 7 or 10 pin.

I won a bracket 3 weeks ago because i had 147 in the 9th frame. my best finish was 177. big deal right? i decided i was going to get those 3 strikes and finish as best as possible. wham.. got the turkey and won the bracket by one pin.

just goes to say you never give up. forget what just happened. worry only about the next shot and relax, stay loose and execute it. only then can you line up or make the right decisions for any adjustments. if you execute the shot well and dont get a strike, you can make a proper adjustment with confidence.

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Re: Keeping Positive with change

Post by kboveington »

Good posts by the first two!

Unfortunately some of this issue boils down to maturity. Not sure how old she is? But part of this will take care of itself as she gets older. With your encouragement and positive attitude this process could run its course a little faster! And it already sounds like you are doing so...

As cliche as it sounds taking it one shot at a time goes a long way. My step dad read a quote from tiger woods when he was talking about how he handles hitting a bad shot and it has stuck with me. He says " face it and erase it" he also went on to say its ok to be upset at a bad shot or even a bad result to a good shot. You have 5 seconds to be mad. Then get over it! *should be around the same time your ball will be back*. Refocus, and regain your confidence. Think back to a series or game, or clutch situation you have performed in if it helps to regain that confidence. Also from my own personal experience I perform my best when I am comfortable on the lanes. This may be challenging at times but be creative in an effort to get comfortable, and stay relaxed.

Well good luck to you both, hopefully this can help...
Make spares make cut, miss spares miss cut. " Bill O'Neil "
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Re: Keeping Positive with change

Post by spmcgivern »

Hard to disagree with what has been said.

But to put my experiences in, it seems like your daughter might care TOO much. She might be trying TOO hard. And she might be trying to impress you TOO much.

When I was a kid, I had a hard time bowling competitively. My dad was well known in the area and I was always referred to as his son. So I was always trying to impress him when he would watch me bowl. I tried sooooo hard. But the harder I tried, the worse I got, especially after a bad frame or two.

I like the idea of the working on the pre-shot routine. It is hard to imagine how important it is, especially by a younger person. Seems unnecessary. But a true pre-shot routine is the most necessary tool in my opinion. Most important is the reactionary phase. Can't keep stuff bottled up.

Here is a example of my favorite:

http://wiki.bowlingchat.net/wiki/index. ... oldid=4678

And here are some other examples from the awesome Joe Slowinski:

http://bowlingknowledge.info/index.php? ... &Itemid=48

http://bowlingknowledge.info/index.php? ... &Itemid=48

http://bowlingknowledge.info/index.php? ... &Itemid=48
MOTIV GIRL
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Re: Keeping Positive with change

Post by MOTIV GIRL »

She needs to make a point to use a mental pre-shot routine in her practice sessions and it will help her to treat every shot the same in competition.
What she needs to start doing is judge the process,and not the outcome.

It helps and the game will get easier--and better--when she chooses to judge her mental routine, or the "process" that is used to create the shot or rather than judge your play by the outcome of that shot.This helps the focus and energy more productively on things that can improve rather than take away from your play!

She needs to stop worrying about her results, and get completely involved in the process of practicing and competing as a confident bowler .It is remarkable how much and how often bowlers worry about their results before they even step on the approach.

She has to know going in,that almost nothing that happens during the course of competition can make her lose her cool.

She has to stop being be a self-punisher,those that punish themselves over every mistake they ever made.

If you are a self-punisher, you are going to risk creating the kind of long-term pressure that choking is ultimately made of. Two of the other consequences for self-punishment are a seriously delayed learning curve, and completely losing the joy that can be so much a part of this sport.

Whether it is practice or competition, she have to really love the challenge that the bowling competition presents to her.

She needs to remember why she bowls. Sometimes we might not see the desired results, but sometimes we are looking in the wrong direction.Learning and winning is about never giving up. Learning from your mistakes and knowing what you want/need to change will help her look in the right direction.

As a bowlers,she needs to work on refining the game she presently has, and don't try to be a type of bowler who tries to use skills in competition that you don't posses yet.It's great that she on working on skills to make you a her better,but she has to compete using the skills from her current level,not those that she is trying to learn.Competing with skills that you don't yet posses,only will get you in trouble.Be patience,the changes she is trying to achieve,takes time.As long as 2 months to one year.
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TrashHeap
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Re: Keeping Positive with change

Post by TrashHeap »

Thanks for the replies and sharing the information.
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